With this post, I wanted to re-visit my TV career/Hollywood exploits one more time. This part of my zany life continues to develop as well in 2011. As you all know from recent posts, I was selected to be on the GSN game show ‘1 vs 100’ in late 2010. This was my first time on TV & I had so much fun. My episodes aired for 2 nights!! December 19th & 20th, 2010. I just checked their website and found that they have posted my 2 episodes online!

I just skimmed thru the first one: 1 vs 100 episode 19 and it completely cracked me up to see myself on TV and getting to relive that wonderful experience. When I was taping, my mind was so focus on the instructions the Producers gave me, the game rules and getting answers right, that I really didn’t get to “be in the moment”. I was totally calm and COMPLETELY Sheila K. Brown with my personality as you will see if you check out the videos below. I’m freaking hilarious!!! Enjoy!

Here is the first episode I appear in: 1 vs 100 episode 19 – I come on at 6:17 :

Here is the continuation of my show: 1 vs 100 episode 20 :

Bookmark It

I do have a pretty cool announcement I was recently informed of. My lil ol Onyxtraveler blog has been selected to be featured on the Black Web Log Awards site on January 17, 2011! They recognize the best Black Bloggers and have done so since 2005! Their site is http://blackweblogawards.com. Make sure you check it out on the 17th. Of course, you know I’ll give you a heads up! I’m excited to get a little internet love!! whoo hoo!!

The Internet Loves Sheila Brown

Cheers,
Sheila

Bookmark It

After a lot of research, I decided to apply a new hot hair treatment called The Brazilian Keratin treatment. Some refer to it as the Brazilian Blowout. I ordered the kit on ebay and completed the 2 day process. Yes, I did say 2 DAY!!! I fully chronicled the process in a very raw and real way on facebook with the dreaded “before” pics (they were pretty damn hysterical, including one of my niece Cara laughing
at my short, kinky afro in one of the pics) to the jaw dropping “after” shots. I went from a super kinky, very tightly coiled (as in could not get the comb thru it) afro to shoulder length, shiny, swingy gorgeous hair with the process. The results look just like results from a relaxer without subjecting my hair to harsh chemicals. For those that have asked me, since I did the process 4 weeks ago, I have shampooed my hair times and the results are still the same. I go from kinky afro to swingy, straight hair after an hour with the flat iron. It is truly miraculous each time!!! Another amazing result, my hair has grown 3/4 of an inch in a month after this treatment. I washed it and flat ironed it this morning and it is touching my shoulders. It was definitely not doing that a month ago as I lost a ton of hair removing the weave. This is exciting news indeed!!! I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THE BRAZILIAN KERATIN TREATMENT!! FYI…I made my Facebook folder that has tons of pics of the process visible only to me. I am no longer in the mood to have people see me with the natural state of my hair. There are videos on this blog though of my weave removal drama & my Dominican Hairstylist results.

What’s next with my hair??? Glad you asked. While I am pleased with the results of the Brazilian Keratin Treatment, wearing my own hair brings it’s own challenges. First, with my own hair, I have to think about it all the damn time. How will I style it, is it cute, how do I camoflage my wrecked hairline as I am working to grow it in?? etc… Also, I have decided to grow it out again to be well past my shoulders and down my back as it was last year and with my constant flat ironing and styling, I run the risk of it breaking off and not growing. I found that I was wearing my Lace Front wigs more frequently as it is a hell of a lot easier to throw on a wig vs. spending an hour doing my own hair and not being totally pleased with the results. I decided to go back to my long Indian Hair weave! This is for a couple of key reasons. First, when my hair is braided under my weave, it is left with nothing to do but grow, grow, grow! It is protected from the
elements and will grow like crazy which is what I want. Second, a weave is so damn easy to maintain. I simply wash it, let it air day and go. As an added and important benefit, I get my “glamour girl” look back that I love so damn much! Whoo Hoo!! Another benefit to having the weave back that only my Sista Girls will understand…I don’t need to figure out how the hell I’m going to keep my wig on and undetected if I am spending the night with my dude, LMAO!!! Ya’ll know what I’m talking about!!! Lawd, that is a lot of damn pressure!! You know how when you get home after having your wig on all day and all you want to do is snatch that sucka off and let your hair breathe. Imagine having to sleep in that sucka cause you can’t go “natural” in front of your man. This is one of the challenges of dating white dudes – they aren’t as informed about our hair traumas as the Brothas are!! LOL

Off to get my weave and pose for pics with my new stylist! Yay!!

For those of you that don’t know what the hell I am talking about, here are videos that explain what Brazilian Keratin Treatment, Lace Front wigs and Hair Weaves are.

BRAZILIAN KERATIN TREATMENT:

LACE FRONT WIGS:

HAIR WEAVES:

Bookmark It

As I blogged about a few posts ago, I made the decision to release the weave for a little while. After taking several weeks to decide what I wanted to do, I stumbled across the world of Dominican hairstylists and their amazing ability to take natural, kinky hair and turn it into soft, silky, swinging hair with just a hair dryer and a flat iron. I was intrigued since I do not want to become addicted to the Cream Crack (relaxers) again and I’ve made the choice to have natural hair. I was able to find an amazing Dominican stylist in Dallas and she worked wonders on my hair today. I am left with an above the shoulder, swingy, chemical free, layered bob that I really like. Now, I do not know how long I will go without my weave as I have several high profile events with multi-millionaires (including Donald Trump) during the month of November. I have found that since I am typically the only Black woman at such events, it is in my best interest to play up my best assests – one of which is my sexy Barbie hair. The weave may go back in at the end of October if I feel like flying to Los Angeles to see my stylist. We’ll see. Until then, enjoy the video diary I did to document this process. Ciao!!

The final day with the weave:

After 7 hours of torture, this is what is left at 4:00am!!!

This is not me, but a VERY accurate representation of what I went thru at the Dominican Salon. And yes, my hair looked exactly like the chick in the video when the process started! Truly amazing transformation!!!:

THE FINAL RESULT!!!!! CAN YOU TELL I LOVE IT??? LOL

Bookmark It

Here are some of my favorite Aaliyah songs. Enjoy!

Bookmark It

So, what is this talk about Black Women and our hair & what does it have to do with my travel exploits? Well, it has everything and nothing to do with my exploits. I’ll explain. As you all know, as I do not make it a secret, I wear a weave. I have done so since I was 15 years old and a Sophmore in high school. I never stopped wearing a weave until my 40th birthday 2 years ago, when I finally mustered up the courage to wear my own hair in public. It was a 3 year struggle to gain the courage to release the weave as I had become brainwashed as to what is the beauty ideal in our society, especially in the Black Community. I love the versality and the look that wearing 18-24 inches of Indian hair gives me, but as I was turning 40, it was time for a change. To be clear, I do not, nor have I ever worn a weave because I do not have hair. This is a very common misconception – that Black Women wear weaves because we are bald-headed. This is total bullshit for many of us. My own hair is super thick and past shoulder length when it is relaxed. The issue for me is that I do not have the “Barbie fullness” /Diva look that a weave gives me. Also, styling my own hair is a time consuming, expensive biyotch!! I have to go to the beauty shop weekly to look sharp. With my current weave, I have not been to the beauty shop in 6 months and I still look fierce!! Honey, I just wash and wear and watch the bouncy, curly curls appear. Yay expensive Indian Hair from Extensions Plus!!! With my own hair, it is a 3 hour ordeal of wash, dry, flat iron or curl. If I do it myself, it looks homemade and funky. Only a stylist can do it justice and that is $50.00 damn dollars and 3 hours a week in the salon chair. Dayum!!! Also, as it pertains to my worldwide travels, I cannot expect to be in some damn foreign country looking for a Black hairstylist. The only place that worked for me was during my 2 months in Paris, Summer 06, when I had the pleasure of being styled by Mr. Marc Clement. He was expensive as hell, but he hooked my custom made, Italian Silky weave up while I was there. LOL Me deciding to have 22 inches of Indian Hair installed before my Australia adventures was a huge blessing. No hair issues at all in the land of “no Black hairstylists or black hair products”. I did eventually find some, but it was after 2 damn months of searching.

As I approach 42 in the next few weeks, I am feeling the need for a major change again, so the weave is coming out again. Don’t know for how long. I’ve been inspired by Tyra Banks, who this season on her show,has decided to wear her natural hair most of the time. She has very nice natural hair, but as with me, it is no where near as thick and “Barbie like” as with her $5k lacefront wigs and weaves. There is also the hairline issue. As a longtime wearer of weaves, one of the extremely unfortunate byproducts is the thinning of or total loss of the hairline. The pulling of the sewn in or glued in hair weaves/lacefronts on the very delicate hairline causes it to disappear. I am very self-conscious about my own forehead, so you will continue to see lots of styles with bangs. Like Tyra, I’ll work to wear my own hair most of the time and the rest of the time, I’ll rock the wigs. I’m hoping to stay out of the weave until I leave the country again in late January. We’ll see. I’ll make sure to document this entire process on video and pictures so that you can experience this with me. Ya’ll will crack up when you see my HUGE, old school Michael Jackson afro when my weave is out. Total Hilarity!

Until then, enjoy the trailer for Chris Rock’s new film, ‘Good Hair’. It truly explains what we as Black
Women go thru for the sake of our hair.

Tyra Banks takes out her weave!!

Bookmark It

In 2007, I was living in LA, single (as usual), no prospects for dates or a boyfriend and I was pretty damn sick of it. This had gone on for years. Even when I had boyfriends, they were so non-committal that I still felt single. That sucked!! I thought of all of the incredibly beautiful, intelligent, sexy, successful, cool, sane, no child having, fun women that were in my circle – and there were tons of them – and I realized that we were ALL SINGLE!!! It made absolutely no sense to me. I surmised that the problem was in living in LA-LA land which is full of EXTREMELY delusional men that are always searching for “the next best thing”. They always think that there is someone better around the corner and if they commit to just one woman, they are going to somehow miss out. Can you say, damaged little boys in pseudo grown mens bodies! Geez!!! It would be different if they all looked like Brad Pitt or Denzel and they had that attitude, but trust, they did not. The most troll-looking mofos had the same belief system. Crazy thing was, women in LA-LA land are so desperate for love or to “be discovered” that they completely eliminate anything that even looks like a standard and they very willingly, sometimes fight to be with the trolls. A woman like me that holds herself in very high regard and has a very clear cut set of standards for the man in her life will be spending weekend nights alone or going out with the girls all the time. Trust me on that one! So, I decided that doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result was pretty damn stupid, so I began to look for alternative places to live. If the mountain won’t come to Mohammed, then Mohammed will go to the mountain! There had to be a city that I could live in that met my criteria: great weather, awesome people, great energy, lots of singles, culture, individuality is celebrated, not racist, lots of wealthy people, hot dudes and cool chicks. Aside from LA, that meant Austin for me. I had been to Texas and Austin many times and the vibe I got was that men in that part of the country are more “relationship minded”. You always see tons of people getting married and starting families. In the 10 years that I lived in LA, I never attended one damn wedding!! I do not know anyone that got married. How damn crazy is that?!!?! I decided to move to Austin, but the time was not right. In my heart, I knew I had more to accomplish/experience in LA and I was right. It was a full 3 years later, in July 2009, that The Universe let me know that it was time to come to Austin and meet my man!!! Yee-Haw Ya’ll!!!!

In getting settled here, aside from finding a place to live, I was laser focused on building a pool of lots of guys to date. I decided to use my marketing expertise to advertise my availability and to meet some dudes. I used many methods to meet guys, including one month on Match.com…. I got off after a month because online dating sucks and it is too tedious for me. It was, however, the most effective way to get some big numbers of men to screen thru. I started dating my 2nd week, with the goal of having 2-3 dates a week. Keep in mind that in LA, if I had 3-4 dates in a year, it was a damn miracle! After being here for 6 weeks now, I have dated approx. 8 guys and I have double digits in escrow waiting to schedule time with me. I had to make a spreadsheet to track them. I’m following author Myreah Moore’s advice in her book, ‘Date Like A Man: What Men Know About Dating and Are Afraid You’ll Find Out’. It is her “Pair-and-a-Spare” strategy. I’m really loving meeting all types of different men that are all cool in their own way. BTW…just for clarification, dating does not mean have sex with. If you are single and dating and want to become serious with the dude, then you might want to keep the coochie on lock until you get some level of commitment. If you do want to get-your-freak-on, then get you a FWB (friend with benefits) and keep it on the downlow. Not saying I do this…it’s just a suggestion for those that might be taking notes. The lesson in this for all of you single ladies out there that are complaining that you cannot find a man, consider changing your location to a place where the odds are in your favor! Don’t keep going to the same dry ass well expecting to quench your thirst!

Sidebar: Also, please make sure you have “DONE THE WORK” on yourself before you begin to realistically expect that you will attract your soulmate. If you have “issues” then deal with that sh*t and stop dragging your same old trunk full of hurt/betrayal/anger/bullshit into your next relationship. Let it go, clear your heart and attract the Love you deserve. Take your big-girl pill, get the help you need to release your sh*t and release yourself from the shackles of your issues! Two amazing self-development resources I highly recommend are: psiseminars.com… and www.landmarkeducation.com…. I have gone thru Psi Seminars and the Woman that I am today vs. the girl/pseudo woman that I was 5 years ago when this journey started is absolutely incredible! Also, I suggest you get your Spiritual house in order. Just a suggestion.

In doing all of this dating, I am learning a lot about myself. I used to have major rejection issues and would be hurt if someone decided they didn’t want to date me. Not any longer, thank God. Mama dealt with that issue! Now, I have given very clear instructions to The Universe that if a guy is not into me and does not want to see me, then please, effortlessly allow him to self-select himself out of my life with a quickness. I then tell God “Thank You for keeping the space clear in my life for my Soulmate when you are ready to reveal him to me.”. This stance allows me to operate from a position of peace and power. It feels good.

I have also become very clear in what I want in a man and I have defined it in my soulmate list. The aspects of a man that I once deemed so important and non-negotiable are not that way any longer. I’ve eliminated all notion of what “package” my soulmate should come in. The whole “tall, dark and handsome” criteria is a nice-to-have, but it doesn’t really matter. I find myself being mysteriously drawn to men that are completely the opposite of what I would choose if the picking were up to me. This feels wonderful! Anyway, I’m rambling. I’ll do more posts on this topic as new and exciting things come up. In the meantime, enjoy this video. Even though it looks a bit silly, the knowledge they are dropping is the truth!! Enjoy!

Bookmark It

My biggest aha from the book was my need to rewrite my soulmate list I wrote 2 years ago. I pulled it out and can ya’ll believe that mofo was 3 pages, FRONT AND BACK!!! WTH?!?! No damn wonder I’m still single. Geez! The book allowed me to become clear about listing my non-negotiables in what I want in a soulmate. Before, I had listed the whole damn kitchen sink. My first attempt at a rewrite allowed me to get down to one page – still front and back! Arrrrrrrrgh… After a lot of prayer, I was able to get it down to what it is now…one page- front only. I love the qualities of what I am looking for. Reading my list fills my heart with love and keeps me in that space. It feels REALLY GOOD! Having one page also allows The Universe to use a net instead of a damn Dixie Cup to find my soulmate, LOL!!

Anyway, enjoy the video and if you decide to buy Arielle Ford’s book, and I highly suggest that you do, please use my link below. Namaste!

Bookmark It